little disappointments

I woke up early enough to get to the Shambhala Center to meditate a while before the Harvest of Peace Pot Luck where I thought I would give best wishes to the Center's new young leader.

When there's a bigger event going on in the Main Shrine Room, the Public Meditation is held in the Smith House next door. I meditated for about 20 or 30 minutes, then walked the back way to the Main Shrine building and was greeted in the lobby by a couple of men in suits standing around tables of food. The Shrine Room doors were closed and dozens of people were inside sitting around long tables which were draped in white. All of the people were bobbing and swiftly chanting through a prayer which I guess has something to do with the Harvest of Peace. I'm not so into the chanting part; it feels a little too "Organized." And that wasn't what I was expecting at all; I thought there would be milling about. In my mind I figured I would just give a quick congrats to A1*, maybe say hi to C1 and be on my way. One of the suited men introduced himself, asked if I wanted to join the group, I bowed out (not literally, though that would've been appropriate).

Next I went to L1's house a couple of blocks away. She had a part to the truck wheels that I needed to get the special locking bolts back on; we've been missing each other for a couple of months. I had emailed to tell her I would be in the neighborhood a couple of days earlier and she'd written back last night saying she would love to see me, that they might be asleep, that the "wheel thingie" would be on the desk, to just come on in if they didn't answer, but that she would love to see me.

Two other women were arriving when I got there. One mentioned as I passed her that she was waiting for all of us to be ready so we could knock on the door together. L1 answered the door with messy bed hair wearing a robe. "I'm totally not ready, guys," she said to the gals, then to me: "I don't have time to see you at all." It wasn't rude, just a little abrupt and unexpected (I guess, though she's always been a bit scattered, and more so since the baby). She handed me the wheel thingie and her copy of the Life in a Box S1 had burned for me to give her. In the sleeve of the DVD was a little slice of pink paper with www.ask-lola.com printed and JAY written on one side and "Relationship Healing" written on the other side. I'll go there later.

Since I didn't spend any time at the Center and since I didn't visit with L1, I was early to pick up G1 for the film festival, so I stopped at Wheatsville and got some trail mix then stopped at a drive-through car wash. I paid $4, the green sign at the far side of the bay flashed ENTER. I pulled slowly in and the "Prewash" drizzle wet my truck with soapiness, then stopped, and that was it. I backed out, called the number on the "IF MACHINE TROUBLE" sign on the front wall and left a message about what had happened.

G1 & I saw a documentary called Born Again, by and about a lesbian raised Evangelical trying not to lose total contact with her family. It was very well-done. G1 grilled me a little about my upbringing before we went to the next film, Shelter Me, an Italian narrative film about two lesbians (one the heir of a shoe factory the other one of the workers there) and the Moroccan boy/man who stows away in their car when their on their way back from holiday. It was very well done. I wasn't sure if G1 liked it -- she's very opinionated and made little comments throughout the film as to her feelings -- but afterward she said, "I really liked it after I stopped hating it." (She's a mystery!)

I had a slight headache, which I fed with a thin hand-rolled cigarette when I got home. And shortly after that, S1 said the white bean chili he'd made was ready, which we ate with a salad he also made; all was yummy. The romaine salad had roasted pecans, sliced pears, blue cheese and a homemade balsamic vinaigrette. I'm lucky to live with such a good cook, for whom meals like this are pretty simple (I would have spent a whole day toiling over a cookbook to do the same, and it likely wouldn't have included the gay salad). He's lucky I enjoy dish-washing.